trial run

I know I am not ready yet (see previous post) but there is always a chance I'd have to be. So in my desperate attempt to be better informed, I decided to immediately practice what I was reading.
Which meant very drastic changes.
The websites I found, my "expert" friends and the books I read all told me what I can and cannot eat, do, etc. Most of this research was done "live" - for instance I found out I shouldn't eat lunch meat AS I was eating a delicious Subway sandwich (I still finished it, for the record).
However, once I learned the hard way, I never forgot - like with nonpasteurized meat. At Winter Camp, when the only option was hot dogs, I chose not to eat at all. And I had a headache that I couldn't do anything about cause I couldn't remember what was safe and what wasn't.

I'm so grateful that this month is more or less a "trial" because I have been making so many mistakes or just eating what I want without even thinking about it. I need this month to figure out what I'm doing so that when it's real, I won't make the same basic mistakes.

Except, now that I've been through this first month and been working so hard, I have to say I kind of wish it was real so I don't have to extend this effort any further than I have to. I'm sure this consciousness is helpful in general, but man, it's a lot of work.